Chapter 148 - Healing My Wounded Heart
Megan\'s POV
"Wow! I think your face will stay that way for the rest of our retreat." Alice said the moment I turned around and found her looking at me with a wide grin on her face with hands on her hips.
"What?" I asked.
"Your face is all red, and flirting with your ex early in the morning seems to suit you very well, my dear best friend." She said, and I walked passed her, and I looked for a vase or bottle where I could put the beautiful roses and lilies Ashton gave me, and I was smiling while I was inhaling the fragrance of the fresh flowers in my hands.
"I am not flirting with Ashton, Al, and you know that, and I couldn\'t believe you will be listening to our conversations," I replied, and she laughed at me.
"How could I not listen to you? I was sitting here, and you were standing over there, and besides, I don\'t have time to cover my ears since I was listening to the chirping of the birds," Alice replied and I frowned at her.
"Megan, there is nothing wrong if you let yourself be happy; you can be true to yourself, besides you are single." She added.
"Alice, I know, but I can\'t allow myself to be a laughingstock again, I was hurting for so many years, and this is the only time I can make him feel how I felt for the last eight years," I responded, and she shrugged her shoulders.
"Good luck with that, Megan; I don\'t think you can handle yourself; the way you looked at Ashton every time he is near you is enough to tell me, you will be throwing yourself at him anytime soon, and you can no longer control your overflowing emotions," Alice stated. At the same time, I walked through the kitchen and got the empty water bottle and knife.
I cut the upper part with the knife, got water from the faucet, and placed each stem on the bottle. I arranged the flowers with a smile on my face, and when I was satisfied with the outcome, I took quick steps walking to the dining hall. I put my improvised flower vase on top of the dining table while I could feel my best friend was following behind me, and when I suddenly swirled around, she almost collided with me.
"Alice, I will never throw myself at Ashton ever again," I responded.
"Okay, I will not argue with you, Meg, but if you did that, I would be the first to be happy. As your best friend, my only wish is to see you smile again like you used to, and I think you should forget about the past now, and be happy again, Megan, if you will only allow yourself to be." Alice declared, and I smiled at her.
"Thank you, Alice, but don\'t worry, I will do that, but for now, I want Ashton to chase me. I don\'t know; I find it fun and exciting." I said, and she laughed.
"I couldn\'t believe the mature Megan I know is still a child inside." She stated, and I laughed.
"Yeah, I am," I responded, and together we walked out from our little cottage. I couldn\'t stop myself from darting a glance at Ashton\'s place, and I know I wanted him to come with us since I know I love to be with him, and his stares will always make my toes curl, but ever since I found out Ashton was in the retreat camp, I could tell my heart became restless.
And the kisses we shared in the garden were enough to make me feel lightheaded until now, and I could still feel his soft lips on mine. I realized his lips still tasted the same, and I know I can\'t deny, I want to be with him, and I thought it would be fun to be with my son and Ashton, and we can be a family. I know I was thinking absurd, but any woman can dream.
Yes, there were times I wished Ashton was with us, especially during a special occasion in school, it hurts me when I heard his classmates ask my son where his dad was, and sometimes it would take a long time before my little boy could answer because he doesn\'t even know who his father is. Still, he usually told them his father was busy touring around the country because he is a singer.
Alice and I started taking the trail, and I smiled when I saw signs where we could follow and guided us where we should go, and it feels exciting because, according to the in-charge, the trail will lead us to the breathtaking view this camp would offer.
"So, where do you think we are headed?" Alice asked.
"I bet it would be an overlooking view of the lake since I know there is a wide lake on the other side of this place which is far enough, but I could say we can see it on the top of this mountain," I replied.
I started to feel the racing of my heart as we walked uphill, and the cold breeze made me smile and relax, and I couldn\'t think of the tiredness of my body as we continued to walk uphill.
"Do you think we can be past the cold spring?" My best friend asked, and I shook my head.
"I don\'t think so, I read the sign on going to the lake when we arrived yesterday, and it was on the other way, and I don\'t think we need to climb uphill; I guess we will go downhill on the opposite side if we wanted to take a swim," I responded.
"I can\'t wait to go swimming, and maybe we can go later." She said.
"Okay, provided we will not drain our energy," I added.
"But I wanted to swim the lake," Alice mumbled.
"Me too, but it would be impossible for us to go there since the lake is so far from here, we can see it from the top view, but we can\'t go there, Al," I responded.
"I know; it was only wishful thinking." She replied, and I couldn\'t stop myself from remembering the past and the memories I had with Ashton\'s at his grandpa\'s estate, where we spent most of our time at the treehouse near the lake, and those memories came over me all at once.
I couldn\'t deny those memories were the best recollections I could ever have, and even if I felt so angry with Ashton after we left Astikoz, I can\'t deny those memories made me happy and sad at the same time. And I can\'t forget Ashton\'s birthday because on that night I gave him myself, and it was the best night ever.
"So, now that you told Ashton about your little boy, will you tell Axel he is his father?" My best friend asked, and I looked at her sideways; and I find it hard to talk now since I am catching my breath, and I could feel the bead of sweat on my forehead.
"Of course, I have too, Axel already asked me about who his father is, and I hated myself that night for not telling him the truth, and I guess that is the most sensible thing to do, tell my son, Ashton Pritzgold is his father," I responded, and she smiled at me.
"Of course, Meg, he is growing fast, and I could tell Axel would love the idea that his idol was his father." She said, and I wrinkled my forehead.
"Well, don\'t get hurt, Axel\'s favorite celebrity is Ashton, and his father was the reason he wanted to watch a football game; your son never tells you about it because he knew you hated football," Alice said and my mouth hangs open.
I know my son loves football, and Alice was right; he never told me once about football, maybe because he heard me occasionally. I reprimanded his nanny for watching the game in her room. And I felt so guilty about it, but Clara understood, but I also knew she was watching the competition behind my back most of the time.
"I will make it up to Axel, and once my son knows about his dad, I will give him enough time to play football with his father." I declared, and I was smiling while looking at Alice, but her face turned pale, and her eyes got so big as a saucer, and she abruptly stopped walking. At the same time, she held my wrist as she looked at me on the ground, and when I followed her eyes, I screamed, and this time she was crying with me as I looked at the gigantic snake crawling on the ground.
I felt so terrified, and I could feel my entire body shake, and I became more frantic when I felt someone hold my waist. Still, I could smell Ashton\'s intoxicating scent right away, and when I looked up, I never felt so relieved my entire life as I gazed at Ashton\'s face, and his calmness made my breathing turn to normal.
"Meg, don\'t worry, I am here; I will never let anything happen to you; besides, that snake is not dangerous as you think; it is not venomous," Ashton whispered in my ear while I clung to him.
I know I am drawing my strength from him, and this time I don\'t care if I am hugging him this close with our close friends watching us. All I knew was I felt secure in his arms, and even if he told me the snake was not harmful, I still felt terrified.
And I couldn\'t deny I wanted to be in his arms longer than necessary, and Ashton\'s warmth gave me a tingling sensation I couldn\'t even explain. And I heard him chuckle, and I wondered what made him laugh, and when I looked at where he was watching, I realized my best friend was hugging Zachary.
I giggled as I realized they looked good together, and I hope they will both discern they could be a good couple. Alice has been single for a long time, and it is about time my best friend should have a love life. I think Alice is now tired of having too many blind dates.
And online dating is not for her either since her date would always turn into a disaster, and she always ended coming home crying or laughing. And I know Zachary is one of the best guys I have ever known, and he is a husband material since he is sweet and caring, and I know Ashton\'s best friend is loyal too.
When I looked at the ground, the python was no longer there, but I was still in Ashton\'s arms, and the way he caressed my head made me feel so at home, and it made me realize I wanted us. And Alice could be right, and I can\'t fight the feelings I have for Ashton anymore.. I want to be with him again, even if I am still healing myself, and I think he will be the one who can completely heal my wounded heart.