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Chapter 37 - Second Thoughts



I went up the lousy stairs. It really sucked all the life out of my already tired body. I got more stares than I could ever hope for. I never really liked the attention and now I was getting the bad kind.

\'Someone\'s in?\'

I had a key with me and so did Merin. But if Merin was in the nurse\'s office then who was in my room? He could have come back I guess, but that was unlikely.

\'I\'ve got a bad feeling about this.\'

I knocked twice and went right in. My expression crumbled a second later.

Merin was on the bed. And on top of him, was Natasha. Both were literally glaring at me.

\'Too bad.\'

I was the first to speak. "You could have at least locked the door." I tried to smile. But no smile came out. "And last I remember girls are forbidden to enter after 6." I tried to chuckle but failed at it too.

Natasha cleared her throat and promptly got up. "Lock the door."

I did lock the door, but I definitely had loads of questions.

"Who enters just by knocking? Shouldn\'t you have at least waited thirty seconds?" Merin was sad, just sad.

"I\'m pretty sure last I heard you were supposed to be at the nurse\'s office till tomorrow morning."

He chuckled and scratched his head. "Yeah, I kind of got a lot better. I have good health you see." He then glared at me again. "And weren\'t you supposed to be in detention!?"

\'Yeah, I doubt that.\'

"I got out half an hour ago. Is your clock okay?"

Actually, was his head okay?

This was getting nowhere and these guys weren\'t giving me any answers either. Come to think of it, I never asked any questions to begin with.

Merin was useless so I just asked Natasha. "What are you doing here at this time?"

"He just got out an hour ago. And I accompanied him in. The dorm manager said it was okay as long as I didn\'t do anything foolish."

She was being very nonchalant about this. And being on top of the guy wasn\'t being foolish? Not to mention not even locking the door?

"Well, I suppose you should get going then." I didn\'t know what was happening between the two now but I didn\'t really have reason to drag this out longer than it should have been. I had a very busy day tomorrow and I needed all the rest I could get.

"You\'re right." Natasha picked herself up and gave a faint smile to Merin. "Bye."

I almost felt a little jealous at the whole exchange.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow." Merin was also smiling.

Now that she left, I just wanted to sleep. It was barely nine. But I was tired.

I launched myself on the bed and a second later realized I was carrying stuff. \'Oh yeah, dinner.\'

The bread got squished but it was still just bread. The milk however was bottled and the bottle did more damage to me than I did to it.

I contained the pain and sat down.

"That\'s it? You\'re not gonna ask anything about all this? And that\'s all you\'re going to eat for dinner?"

"Not interested in hearing your fantasies. And what do you mean that\'s all? This is like a luxury. Have you ever tried dipping bread in chocolate milk?"

"No." He reminisced something and his face curled a little making a disgusted look. "I don\'t think so."

I didn\'t like the look but who cared.

"But I\'m glad you were this strong. I\'m jealous, of course, I\'m jealous. But I\'m also glad." Merin didn\'t look at me but I could feel the bitterness in his voice.

I didn\'t say a word.

***

Knock! The moment my dinner was over there was a knock.

The timing didn\'t really feel all that much of a coincidence.

I opened the door and it was Marg. No surprise there. I had a feeling it was her.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

"You fought again today. Your mom was worried and she wants the uniform back so she could try sewing. It\'d be a waste to throw all that out or so she said."

After yesterday, I actually kept my phone open. I didn\'t have a Holo and I didn\'t like using phone in public but even so I kept it open and with me. But my mother still contacted Marg instead of me? I really didn\'t like where this was going.

"Say, sorry to her, please." I got the torn uniform in a bag and handed it over to her. "That\'s all?"

She was still by the door. She didn\'t even bat an eye at Merin. "Your mother would be here first thing tomorrow with your sister. She wants you to eat a healthy dinner and breakfast."

\'Should have seen that coming.\'

I sighed. I should have known she\'d want to come. "Guess so." But wait, Marg\'s powers were rare and useful. I actually hadn\'t thought of this before but what if. Just what if- "Say Marg. Have you ever considered the possibility that your powers could make a ton of money? We could you know, build our own transport company and-" I almost sounded like a manager who just found the next big star on the road.

"I\'ll be turning seventeen soon."

"Huh? What does that have to do with his?" It took me a second to process this. "Wait, you\'re older than me!?" My birthday wasn\'t due for another three months: so she was a quarter year older than me?

"After I turn seventeen I\'ve to go back home. I have a responsibility. " Marg\'s eyes turned fierce for a second. But why the hell was she ignoring me? "SO it would be better for you to no get dependent on my powers. And besides, I\'m already rich."

She almost brought tears to my eyes when she said the thing about being rich: she just crushed all my dreams. I\'d forgotten for a moment that she was nobility.

"Okay." I closed the door, barely containing myself.

\'There goes my hopes of making money.\'

Chuckle!

There was a suppressed chuckle coming from the bed behind me. "I saw nothing, no worries."

I really wanted to say something but at this point, it would have been just more awkward.

Bam!

I could swear I heard a faint sound of something slamming against the wall a little far away but that was probably just my imagination.

***

I went to bed at exactly ten. If I remembered clearly, then the duel would take place at nine tomorrow. Whether it\'d be the gym or the lightsaber court, wasn\'t specified. Actually, they hadn\'t contacted me ever since. Micheal or rather Mike had told me that he\'d be giving me details later but nothing of sort happened.

"You know-" Merin attempted.

The lights were off.

"I\'m trying to sleep. Shut up."

"Rude." He chuckled. "Anyway, thanks."

"No problem." I really didn\'t want to have a conversation.

Merin took the hint and didn\'t say anything else.

I was glad that he was grateful but I wasn\'t doing this for him. I was doing this for my own selfish reasons. Besides this whole fiasco wouldn\'t have happened if it weren\'t for my mouth. So part of this was just my way of paying them both back.

So whenever he tried to thank me, it just felt awkward.

But this, all of this just felt awkward to me. There was so much at stake in this fight. My family would be there tomorrow and if I just happened to lose in front of them, how would I face them later? I knew my mother and sister wouldn\'t belittle me but the thought of letting them down kind of crippled me. And then there was the pressure of going up against a Battlesuin and trying to destroy his reputation. This whole thing seemed like a bad idea.

Dan was strong. And if it weren\'t for the move, a move that I couldn\'t use on all occasions I would have lost. And that guy lost to Blaze. So I couldn\'t really rest easy. \'What if I lose?\'

The thought kept me awake.

Eventually, I did fall asleep, but my heart fluttered more than I wanted.

***

YAWN.

I woke up. The sleep was good. So much so that I was suspicious. I looked at the clock and sure enough, it was eight. I was two hours late according to my usual routine and no wonder this felt so good.

Sigh!

When the morning starts off with a big sigh it always ended up pretty bad for me. But I guess today was supposed to be special. It sure didn\'t felt like that special to me though.

I was late but I didn\'t really want to worry about all that. Everything would have been fine as long as I skipped exercise and some other things. I had some leftover bread and that was enough for a light breakfast. Too bad I didn\'t have milk though.

I was never really a breakfast person anyway.

"Mmmgg…mnmggag." Merin was sleeping a bit too peacefully.

I let him sleep, he didn\'t have to worry about all this.

\'I\'ll just shower afterward.\'

***

I reached the Gym at exactly 8.45. A little tight call: my heart was still fluttering. \'Am I nervous?\'

When was the last time I was nervous? I sure couldn\'t remember.

There wasn\'t anyone at the lightsaber court and actually, there wasn\'t anyone out at all. What happened to everyone? For some reason, I didn\'t want to know.

I went inside the Gym, and sure enough, there was a crowd here. I\'d actually only been here once but back then there weren\'t so many seats here. This place had at least the same amount of seats as the auditorium, and most of the seats were filled too.

"Is he even going to show up?"

"Probably ran away." Two guys were laughing rather wildly in a loud voice. The gym was quiet so, their voice went far and wide. The poor souls didn\'t realize that I was actually right behind them. "What do you expect from cowards like that?" They laughed even louder.

I was already pretty pissed about not being able to so some exercise in the morning and now being late. But this just pushed me harder than necessary. And then there was me being nervous. So this was the perfect opportunity to let out some steam.

"Ahem!" I cleared my throat a bit louder than intended and gathered a lot of attention. "Did you go senile or something?" Again, my voice was pretty loud. "Or is it that, all of you are impotent and your energy goes to your mouth instead?" I was so ticked off that I didn\'t realize that I was basically saying some pretty intense stuff.

"YOU!" the guy who called me a coward was about to get up but-

"It\'s okay." The guy next to him smiled and just pointed me towards the stage.

Both of them settled down but I did receive glares. Not that I cared. At least I wasn\'t so nervous anymore.

It was better to have done this than to see my mother or sister lash out, unnecessarily. Both my mother and sister were nice people but they could never stand to see our family- me insulted. I guess the same went for me.

These two though actually looked older than me. And so did a lot of the other students.

\'Second years are here too?\'


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