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Chapter 601



“Nes’na van termifu keln, Eshwlyn?” Lenora remarked upon finally losing sight of her fading, shrinking figure. “Hal’man Elvan dorinur kotor?

Eshwlyn poured the content of the stew into two separate bowls, passing over the bigger portion into the shivering hands of her sister.

“Navilan...” She responded, blowing away the swirl of hot steam. “Nesna... navilan...”

“Sona no?” Lenora smiled at her, a dubious brow steadily rising. “Za Nes’na... Terra nar... dorinar ko?”

“Nes.”

“No, you don’t, silly,” a shake of the head, a nudge of the shoulder. “If you believed that, you would have killed her already. You wouldn’t have let her go. I know deep in your heart... you know that not all humans are the same, that some can be different... ” then peering over at the empty horizon once more, Lenora formed another tender smile. “That she is different...”

.....

Indeed. Despite the stories, the atrocities, and the beliefs she’s held so long and dear to herself, Terra appeared to be different from it all. Except... was she actually different?

Was she really?

If she was truly different, then she would return to the humans, she would not breathe a word of this experience, of this location, and never dare return here once more.

But... how would she ever truly know for sure? Letting her go, letting her live... who’s to say that things would actually turn out that hopefully... turn out different... and not the way things always have been as history time and time again foretold.

An end of blood, fire, and brimstone.

With humans, it can never truly end different.

That night, when the sky dimmed to its darkest, careful to not pester a slumbering Lenora, Eshwlyn went snuck away from the burrow, trailing after the faint footsteps in the trodden dirt, sniffing the cold, blistering air for the familiar putrid stench still blighting the atmosphere, guiding her, leading her... the glint of her blade reflecting the pale moonlight... as well as the resolve shimmering fiercely in her gaze...

It was a long linear trek forward that had her venturing far from her usual haunts and into the murky unknowns of uncharted territory. It brought her high, it clambered her low, and always within sight even in the pitch darkness, the highest plateau of her old home sitting quietly afar, beyond reach – a home that was no more.

She will not let her home now come undone.

The outlines imprinted onto the earth soon became more prominent, as did that foul odor that for too long now had always been a source for company... gradually, she quieten her approach, slinking into the shades and cover of sturdy branches up high – for she heard it, there, above the scurry of insects, the soft howl of the air nipping the exposed skin of her perked ears, the gentle hum of a soft voice, a melody alone, isolated... another one of her many still infuriating noises.

Terra showed no hints of exhaustion in spite of the long strenuous distance she had covered over quite a period of time, undaunted not by the cold nor night, she forged on, a single flickering flame emanating from a fingertip her only source of light and warmth... and sometimes fiddling almost endearingly with the crown of flowers that sat perfectly around her head.

For some time, Eshwlyn just watched her, stalked her... continuing to hunt her... she had no reason for idling, hesitating her chance... from treetop to treetop... she, for some reason, found herself hoping for an interruption to the silence.

A Melder pouncing from the bushes, an Aeron swooping from above, perhaps an ambush from a Matriarch too well-hidden... even a Glean slithering through would be more than welcome, anything, just anything... anything besides her.

Make it simply be an unfortunate accident, an unfortunate predicament unable to be altered. Make it natural... make it so the blame lies solely on her foolishness, in this darkness, alone no less... and make it so the blood that would be spilled wouldn’t fall onto her hands.

But not a rustle, nor a slither, ever once came to heed her request.

And so, retempering her resolve, Eshwlyn dropped quietly down onto the dirt, remorseless, apathetic... her tightening grip around her sword’s hilt desperately affirming those claims true... as she silently unsheathed the cold, sharp silver from its scabbard.

Then, it happened – the always witless, oblivious, the human’s footsteps coming to a sudden halt. Terra stood in place, the continuous flicker of her pale flame in the breeze the only offset to her almost eerily frozen silhouette.

“Oh no,” The woman quietly expressed, a wispy breath then faintly blew past her swaying raven locks. “Did you come here to kill me, Eshwlyn?”

There was no time to react, no chance to hide, Terra snapped around behind her, her gentle blue eyes almost delighted to see her again, if not for the blade she had raised forward toward her.

But much to the Elf’s surprise, she found no animosity, no anger, not even a sliver of resentment in the human’s stare, still just that kindness... only that kindness.

“I thought you might come after me... I mean, alone, nothing but my thoughts and song – the possibility didn’t escape me,” Her flame continued to waver, to glow, only dimmer, frailer. “Not that I don’t understand why you choose this. After all, I’m human, I know of your home, your land... and here I am taking that knowledge to my people... a strong maybe that you can never be sure of, so yes, I really do understand the position you’re in... but even so... the fact that you actually did come after me... frankly stings more than I ever expected it to.”

Eshwlyn maintained her rigid aloofness, only allowing an unblinking stare in offer. “You find... me...” Her stiff lips managed to shape and say. “How... find me?”

“How I knew you were behind me?” Terra easily deciphered, forming a smile almost amused by the question, as once more, her wandering gaze settled back to the gleaming silver of her sword. “I always recognize the sound of my brother’s sword being drawn. After years, a lifetime, it’s not a sound... or a memory... you can just simply forget.”

At once, her mind flared in a raging whirlwind of confusion and realization... she felt a flicker in her stare, the heavy blow of shock, staring at this human, this woman, hearing her words echo again within the hurricane of dissonance – and once more, she found her memories going back to that day, that human, that person.

“Cale...”

“You know his name!” Terra exclaimed, placing a hand over her gaping lips halfway forming a smile, before abandoning the attempt, and simply letting her expression show bare. “I... I didn’t think you’d know it... much less even bother to remember it. I don’t know, for some reason... it’s a little comforting hearing you say his name... I guess, you know... it feels as if my brother wasn’t exactly meaningless to you... even if he was.”

Eshwlyn felt the grip on her sword slightly sink, felt a weight that wasn’t previously there, the revelation obstructing her focus, “Cale... you?” She blinked, irrationally furious. “Cale... you?!”

“Yes, Cale – my brother,” Terra replied, never sounding more earnest than right then. “He was supposed to be a Gransmen, you see. It’s quite the position to hold, the training, the regime he would have to follow just to stand a chance... well, he didn’t want any of that. He dishonored our family name by going against his purpose – taking his sword and leaving home forever. But he didn’t forget me, he never forgot me...”

Words spoken so tenderly, gently... it sounded too unsettlingly familiar. The way her eyes softened, her expression brightened... it was as if Eshwlyn was staring deep into an inverse mirror reflection.

“I was the only daughter, and now the only child, thus the only one left to uphold the prestigious family name of Mairo. My magical prowess allowed me to enroll in the most prestigious academy in Astra... and there, the pressure just kept mounting and mounting, from my family, from my teachers... from my country. And my brother was all too aware of the heavy burden he had placed on me. One day and the following days onward, I began receiving countless letters, countless gifts overseas, expressing his remorse, his regret... his love... how he missed me dearly... how much he wished he could see how high I have grown... or just how beautiful I’ve become... embarrassing things like that.

“I would write to him back whenever possible. I would tell him of my circumstance, my frustrations, my fears... and within weeks, I would always find another letter at my desk easily assuaging all my worries in a heartbeat. Then the day of Nul arrived – where apprentice sorcerers would be appraised and graded. Cale understood its importance, implications, and trying to comfort me, he offered a reward, anything I could ever ask for – so long as I was able to top the entire academia. I replied, just a simple request – I told him to come home. He said it was a promise.”

Promise, the word resounded like a hollow cry. The way it sounded leaving her lips... such a warm word feeling so empty.

“I trained, I studied, I excelled, I graduated, earned an apprenticeship with the Magus Fle, I excitedly wrote to my brother all about the things that were happening, I even sternly reminded him of his promise to me,” Terra’s eyes dropped its gentle blue glow, the smile on her face frozen stiff. “To this day, I still never received a single letter back from him.”

Eshwlyn recalled again that one early spring day, coming upon that almost lifeless corpse. How he looked at her, how he pleaded with her... and then how she murdered him.

So easily it felt, back then. Even now, it still felt so easy... it still felt so nice... and yet... what was this heavy feeling pulling her deep down now?

“Now that I’m old enough, I came here to this land in search of my letter, of my response... and eagerly, my brother,” Terra abruptly stirred once more, spurring a single step forward, and raising a single finger. “And what do I then discover that fateful day... but my dear brother’s sword in the hands of a stranger, an Elf, that was mere inches away from ending my life once and for all?”

A long, tense quiet followed... a silence long enough for the flame in Terra’s fingertip to extinguish – complete darkness then ushered in by the faint swirl of smoke. It was just now the billowing wind blowing strong, the flutter of withering leaves blanketing the earth in a canvas of red and yellow, as well as the steadied breathing of unfettered resolves.

“Do you really wish to kill me, Eshwlyn?” Terra asked the glowing beads of green across from her. “You can if you want to... easily too. There are no Velania Trees for me to tear branches from to defend myself with. I’m quite out of practice with my magic. Fighting you now, I stand no chance.”

For an answer, Eshwlyn took a large daunting step forward, followed by another, the crackles of leaves echoing in her wake.

“Humans... cannot be... trust...” She said. “I cannot trust... you...”

“Can’t trust me, that’s fair...” There was no defiance, no outcry, Terra simply remained in place, nodding just once, “So be it. If it’ll guarantee your safety to you – do it.”

Undoubtedly, unhesitantly, absolutely she’d have her blade slicing clean across the air, except – the heaviness, the weight, even now, it was still present, keeping her sword locked in place.

“Why?” She found herself asking. “Why not... angry?”

And just as caught off-guard, the human furrowed her brows. “Hm?”

“You... I... took from... you...” Eshwlyn spoke, saying more than she ever thought she could. “I took... your Cale... I took your... brother... his sword... I have taken... everything... from you...”

It was the most logical, most instinctual process to process, it’s how these humans act, it’s how they thrive, it’s how they live, it’s how they are made. So why – why then, she kept pondering, asking...

“Why are you... not angry...?”

“Why am I not angry?” Terra repeated, letting out a short breath that was stifling a chuckle. “If only it was that simple, you know? If only I was. If only I could muster up the rage to rip the earth from your feet, to yell and scream, go out in a blaze and die trying, and hopefully succeed in killing you. If it was just that easy, Eshwlyn... I would have already done it a long time ago.”

“Kill... me...” Eshwlyn mimicked. “You... kill me?”

“But I won’t, I can’t, I just simply can’t bring myself to...” She shook her head. “Because I’ve already forgiven you.”

“For... given...?”

Another strange new word, and yet, for some unknown reason, hearing it, saying it, deep within, it felt as if she already understood its meaning clearly.

“I was like you. I hated Elves the way you hated us. You’re all depraved monsters, killers, murderers, the essence of evil endowed in your very nature – and no doubt that killing, merciless nature of yours is intrinsic. But – living with you and your sister made me realize that you can be different.”

The Elf remained quiet, her blade still held raised steadily forward, yet unmoving, choosing instead to further listen.

“That you can learn, you can be gentle, kind, merciful... your sister is extraordinarily different... but so are you too... you are every bit that of which I describe too. Your action, forbearance, dedication – you just refuse to see it, refuse to believe it. It’s why my brother is dead, and is precisely why you also now aim his sword to pierce me through.”

A jolt in her arm strained her hold on the hilt once more, growing heavier and heavier.

“Well, I believe it, Eshwlyn...” Terra boldly declared. “And it’s because I believe that you are different that I can wholeheartedly forgive you for the unforgivable, and why I can still call you a dear friend of mine.”

Then, showing more nerve and boldness, she turned away from the Elf, leaving her back purposefully exposed, and promptly continuing her trek without a single semblance of fear in her motions.

Eshwlyn sounded a warning growled, affirmed further by a booming step forward.

“You can kill me, I won’t stop you,” Terra said in response. “I don’t know what we humans did to have sparked such a hatred to fester within you... but if killing me soothes that urge of yours, then go, alright, go.”

She could feel the clench in her teeth, the slant in her brows, and how her muscles ached with urgency, impulse, and instinct... and yet...

“But...” Terra said, partly glancing back at the Elf with a smile of utter sincerity. “I just hope for you, that someday, if it is not today, you can find it in your heart to believe in your own kindness... and finally forgive us too.”

“For...give...”

There’s that word again, finally dropping the sword from her crushing hold, setting her breathing, her muscles, her nerves all at ease... as she kept rooted in place, quietly watching the human go onto the night, never once looking back again.

“Forgive... you...”

Whatever it meant, whatever it implied... maybe... just maybe... it wouldn’t hurt much to give it a try.


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