Chapter 251: Heroine Chapter: Any price. [2/2]
'I must show him my worth. If not, he may tire of me and throw me away. Fortunately, we return to Hellsgate tonight! I will show you my beloved. That I deserve to be in your harem!
Such thoughts filled my mind, but uneasiness and fear slowly seized my heart.
'What if the rest of the Sirens do better? What if I do terribly?'
I saw how powerful my sisters were in Japan. Right now, the only woman I could physically defeat was Bella. But unlike me, she was wise and my beloved relied on her greatly.
While I was still afraid, more proof that my husband's love engulfed me.
"{Limitless} is meant to be my namesake. I wanted it to protect you along with {Rewind}. Only the women I love can use it."
My heart almost leapt out of my chest. I could feel his emotions as he confessed his {Kismet}. The affection in his voice made my knees weaken. How could such a loving man exist?
Overwhelmed with emotion, I stole his lips to accept his gift. Fearing that his words were a lie, I listened to the download with trepidation.
"All I ask is that you let me love you and stay by my side."
This line alone nearly made me scream with joy. Serenaded by his {Kismet}, I felt nothing but bliss. The man I loved also loved me, there could be no greater happiness.
'How wonderful it would be if I alone received his affection,' I shamelessly wished to the heavens.
I had more than fifty mothers, but I knew for sure that less than four had a place in my father's heart. The rest were simply abandoned. No other man would want them, for they belonged to a Revenant. Thus only an eternity of wasting away awaited them.
Feeling that I was becoming too greedy, I allowed the rest of the Sirens to have his attention during lunch and ate alone. Thanks to {Limitless}, I now had {Listen} and {Perceive}, so even though I was seated far from the man I adored, I heard every word he spoke.
Unfortunately, I felt miserable. My beloved was too doting, I simply didn't deserve him. Conflicted, I became disgusted with myself. Although I wanted more, I knew I already enjoyed more than I deserved. In bitterness, I ate in silence as I wept.
"I am so pathetic. I am nothing but a coward," I berated myself.
Even though I knew I was blessed, my heart longed for more.
'Unlike the rest of the Sirens, my love for John was tainted. My homeland required someone to save it. And I had no one else to turn to. How could I claim to love him when I burden him the fate of an entire continent on his shoulders! What do I even have to offer?!'
I tried to eat my insecurities away. But his words to Robyn shook my heart again.
"I do, I want to know everything about you. About all of you."
Inside my heart began to beat loudly. Like Robyn, I had made many mistakes. They were things I wanted to hide. Even {Withstand} was born because of those mistakes. They were chains that bound me, an ugly truth that I could never run away from.
"But what if you don't like what you hear? I killed a lot of people, Possum."
Yes, I found myself nodding at Robyn's words. Tears streamed down my face as I remembered the sin I had committed. I should be punished, I had no right to be happy. My mistake robbed so many of their lives and contributed to the fall of the North.
"Shh. This applies to all of you. I do not care what you did before or why. It is what allowed you all to become who you are. As your husband, I will shoulder all your sins from now on. Robyn, you are more important to me than anyone you have killed.
If heaven decides to punish you for that. I will suffer with you."
He would shoulder my sins? Did such a beautiful promise apply to me? I felt my heart hurt for some reason. Why did Robyn deserve such love and I didn't?
Was this torment what my mother-in-law had said earlier? The agony of sharing one's spouse? It was painful. Wasn't this supposed to be normal in the North? Why was I feeling this way? My mood soured when Jas and Robyn received affection from our kindred.
Maybe it was because we all had {Limitless}, even Lilly, Bella, Aki and Jo had miserable faces. Noticing this, Noelle tried to change the mood by sharing the second purpose of this party.
To celebrate the birthday of my beloved.
It was a foreign concept to me when I first heard about it. Because of the limited food in the North, celebrations were just massive orgies. No one celebrated with food. But the Southerners not only had things to eat, they even had something called sweets.
Of the ones Lilly had me taste, my favorite was called cake. Alana and Bless brought a big cake to my beloved while everyone else sang Happy Birthday.
It was a lively song, consisting of only one verse repeated five times. Although I had only heard it for the first time a few days ago, I could sing it quite well.
However, as we continued to sing, something I never expected happened.
My beloved began to shed tears.
Why? What was going on?! Was he in pain?
This man fought almost to the death without fear or complaint. Against the undead, against the reapers, even against a Revenant. It wasn't important to him who he was fighting.
The {Counter} he unleashed during the enlistment was something only I could understand. Just how much pain had he accumulated to fuel such a powerful strike? But even during that time, he never shed a single tear, not even one.
My heart felt like it was being torn apart. The man I loved the most was crying so pitifully. In my mind as well as in my heart, only one phrase repeated itself endlessly.
'I want to comfort him and take his pain away. '
Earl Simmons, my father-in-law, then made a suggestion.
"John, make a wish and blow out your candles."
My beloved replied with a face of pure bliss. "I don't have to. All my dreams have already come true."
At that moment a new fire began in my heart, one that consumed my entire being.
The North, the Sirens, Hellgate and everything in between. My guilt, my sin, and my worth. All these things no longer mattered.
Only one thing did.
I was born to love this man.
"And I will pay any price to see that smile on his face again," I swore to fate.