My Father in Law is Lu Bu

Translated by Bloodfalcon, Edited by Krayto

Night fell slowly, the Wancheng city Administration Office is lit up brightly.

The new master of Wancheng city invited all of Lujiang’s nobles to a banquet. One after another, these nobles arrived, but they did not exchange greetings with their master and just kept going inside.

Lu Bu also ignored these people’s behavior. Above the table, good food was prepared for them. All of them are seated properly.

“Gentlemen, all of you definitely know why I invited you here!!!” Lu Bu went directly to the point. “I am asking for grain and provisions. Bu and Bu’s Bing Province Heavy Cavalry is our Han Dynasty’s protector. Therefore we will not make trouble to you. However Bu’s Bing Province Heavy Cavalry grain and provisions is insufficient, therefore Bu asks all of the gentlemen here to help Bu!!!”

After Lu Bu said his opening speech, someone opened up the conversation “Thank you General Lu for being our protector. General Lu’s accomplishment will definitely benefit all of us. We will definitely provide a good amount of grain and provisions for General Lu and will also give money to you in order to strengthen our Han Dynasty armed forces! However...” the head of Wang clan suddenly becoming embarrassed “These are times of war, common people are dying one by one; even we are unable to sustain our livelihood. My Wang clan for example have dismissed all of our servants. In peaceful times, we definitely will comply with your request but for now, we are sorry, we are also helpless ourselves!”

The head of Wang clan is definitely a master of acting. He can change his expression from time to time, showing regret, grief, anger and sometimes frowning and eventually he showed that he had gritted his teeth and said “Very well then, due to General Lu and his Bing Province Heavy Cavalry are risking their life for our Lujiang, how can we let those soldiers hungry to death. Even though my Wang clan also suffers starvation. General Lu, I am willing to allocate 20-shi of grain and provisions to give to you!”

20-shi?! Lu Bu’s eyes flashing dangerously. At the seat of honor, he unconsciously pinched his fist.

20-shi of grain and provisions, if those are given to commoner’s family, they possibly can have one year, even one-and-a-half years of rations. But for these noble clans, perhaps their daily meal is worth more than 20-shi of grain, and maybe their delicacies are more than 10,000 taels of gold.

Now, they are sending 20-shi of grain and provisions. It’s like giving food to a beggar.

“Yes, General Lu. These times of war is truly uncomfortable, we are also affected by it! However, we absolutely will not let General Lu starve, my Li clan only can provide 30-shi of grain and provisions, in these times we already saving food for us to eat!” The head of Li clan suddenly stood up and said.

30-shi? Lu Bu’s heart began emitting killing intent.

“General Lu’s work is very accomplished. Even if I have to sell everything in my house, I must help General Lu! I provide 10-shi of grains and provisions!”

Huh, selling everything in your house and you can only provide 10-shi?!

“I provide General Lu with 50-shi. I planned to buy a fat pig for my family. But now General Lu is in difficulty, we must help with whatever we can!”

While all of the clan head speaking in turn, the head of Zhou, Chen and Liu clan just kept silent and watching Lu Bu.

“I provide 200-shi!” Finally the head of Liu clan opened his mouth.

“200-shi? Brother Liu, you are really insane!” The nearby heads of clan also quickly acting as if they are truly surprised with head of Liu clan. “You give 200-shi, what will your family be able to cook? How will you be able to survive?!”

“It is no problem at all for me, our home will just be reduced from eating two meals to one meal then! No matter what, General Lu’s soldiers must not be hungry!!!”

“Yes, previously when General Sun is the master, we are unable to help him, we are unable to help our Han Dynasty. Now with General Lu here, we definitely can return our debt to our country. Even if we have to starve and thirst ourselves we will definitely help General Lu!” Chen Yao said raising his voice. In his words, General Sun and did not have opportunity to return a debt to the country. This is not demeaning Sun Ce, but being a cynic toward Lu Bu!

Lu Bu almost cannot hold his rage in front of these noble families. They are dominating 80% of Lujiang’s total wealth, their land amounted to ten thousand mu, but all of them are acting toward Lu Bu as if they are poor people. If they cannot eat until they are full and truly gave their own provisions to common people, then in this nation, there will be no one who starved to death.

Lu Bu quickly took a deep breath, he is truly afraid that he will be overcome by his emotion and cut down these people “So, Bu is very sorry now for forcing all of you to support Bu. Bu really did not know about all of your predicaments. Furthermore, these foods that are presented now, it is too extravagant. Bu did not know how many flesh and blood were sacrificed for the banquet tonight!”

“Yes! These foods are worth of one and a half year for my family to eat!”

“Yes, General Lu! We cannot be too extravagant! Eating until full is already a big blessing!!!” Those clan heads talked while looking at Lu Bu. At the surface they seem to be respectful but inside, they are sneering toward him.

All of them thought “You want us to donate food to you right?! OK, we donate to you, we give you 20-shi of grain and provisions. It’s not that we don’t want to donate, but instead we are also “poor”. We even told you that these meal is very extravagant even for us!!!”

“Servants, please remove these extravagant dishes! This time, the nation is still suffering, we should not be too extravagant and wasteful. Eating these foods meant eating the flesh and blood of common people, this act can be smitten by the gods! Send simple meals!” Lu Bu’s mouth is sneering and thought “Nice acting, eh? I will follow your train of thoughts now!!!”

All of extravagant dishes are quickly taken away and changed into simple meals. With all meals changed into Jiu Cai dishes, all of clan head brow wrinkled very much.

TL: Jiu Cai: vegetable that was eaten only by poor people http://cafenilson.com/wp-content/youchoyfresh.jpg

Three vegetables soup, one meat dish and two vegetable dishes. The vegetable are picked from wild herbs from the wilderness. The meat dish is only a few slices of meat added with wild mushrooms mixed into the dish. At that meat, it still had pig’s hair on it.

This is to let those haughty clan heads who are “starving” right now, to fill their belly.

And as for the rice, it is brown rice. White rice is very difficult to find. So brown rice is mixed with bran, chestnut shell and even small stones.

Those clan head currently swallowing their saliva over and over again. These bowl of foods also had burnt insect on it, they began to wonder, is this human food?

“What is wrong? Is not everybody hungry?!”Lu Bu picked up his chopsticks quickly and started to eat. Those clan heads are truly disgusted with this food and now they are truly stunned because this food is actually eaten by Lu Bu with a guzzle.

None of those clan heads are touching their chopsticks. Lu Bu’s heart is sneering toward them and said “I am truly sorry, our army’s grain and provisions are already insufficient. I am truly moved with your heart and want to give all of you some financial aid also, but unfortunately, our army was also stricken by poverty in this time of war. Therefore I can only serve all of you plain food. I beg that all of you can be understanding with my situation!”

Lu Bu wanted to borrow grain and provisions from these noble clans, but these nobles actually rejected him politely and even treated him like a beggar, saying that their family’s grain stock has been diminished. So Lu Bu just played with them, he showed them his army’s rations in order to keep their pace.

Lu Bu said it in a very sympathizing tone, but he actually was just sneering toward those poor pretenders.

“We understood!” Said those poor pretenders while disgusted trying to digest the food.

Lu Bu then said "This food is really delicious, All of you cannot eat this well at home right?! See, we also provided you with meat!!!" But none of those head clans took their meal and then Lu Bu ordered those food to be picked by female servants and started to stand to propose a toast.

“Come, let’s drink, this drink is for you all of Lujiang noble clans. Without all of you, Lujiang will be nothing. Bu and my Bing Province Heavy Cavalry respect all of you one cup!” Lu Bu propose a toast toward all of clan heads.

Lu Bu is Wancheng city current master. He also had the title of General Who Pacifies the East, and he is also Governor of Xu Province. Therefore those noble clan heads cannot look down Lu Bu for it will breach etiquette severely, so 1 by 1 those nobles raised their wine glass to return toast.

They quickly drink that wine and immediately their face become green. Because this wine is actually vinegar. It should have been clear wine, instead Lu Bu give them fermented wine, which had turned into vinegar.

“Cough!!!” An elder clan head was choked by this wine. From the very first time he drank the wine, he just kept the wine in his mouth. But Lu Bu has drank his wine in one gulp, those people have no alternative but must return the gesture to respect Lu Bu. So they just endured the sourness while drinking the wine.

“Gentlemen, Bu just become the master of this city, later I will need all of you to help Bu. Bu again respects everybody here one cup!” Lu Bu quickly drank another cup.

Drink again? Those head clans are truly in a big predicament. Drink this wine again? Drinking one cup is already too much for them, how can they drink another one?

“Why do all of you not drink? Is this wine not to your liking?!” Lu Bu looking at all of clan heads, each of them are showing an ugly complexion.

It’s not that the wine isn’t tasty, but this is not a drink for a human. They actually wanted to say it, but their mouths just kept silent.

“General Lu, it is not the wine is not tasty, but you gave us vinegar, vinegar!!!” A clan’s head stood out and said it out loud.

“Oh, vinegar eh? That two cups? Ooooooohhhhhh I know, I know, it is because we are hungry that this wine tastes like vinegar! Okay then, we eat first, then we can drink this!” Lu Bu signaling to those female servants to return the food to the table in order for those nobles to eat.

Either those Jiu Cai or those mushroom or those hairy pork, those nobles when looking at it, their faces are filled with disgust and bitter complexion. And now they ate them truly half-heartedly.

“Come on, let’s drink again!” Lu Bu quickly held up his wine glass. Those clan heads are already learned much from the previous experience. If they do not want drink this vinegar, they must eat that pig food. If compared to the food, this vinegar is much better.

With Lu Bu proposing a toast, the nobles helplessly drank the vinegar again.

“Ohh, Master Chen, why do you not move your chopsticks? Does Master Chen dislike this foods?!” If those nobles said “I like it” then they must show big appetite to eat it, but if they said “I don’t like it” then it is a slap to the banquet master.

“I did not dislike it, but it is solid food. Recently my stomach is not good so my daily meal is only congee, so I do not have the luck to enjoy good food!” Chen Yao then thought “I would rather die than eat these things! This is not a food for human beings!!! Even my dog does not eat this.”

“Eat only congee?!” Lu Bu looked at Chen Yao with only one eyes. A moment ago he satirized Lu Bu viciously and now you said you have a bad stomach and cannot eat this meal that I prepared? Keep dreaming.

“Why did Master Chen not say so earlier?! Bu will certainly prepare it for you!” Lu Bu complained.

“Please do go through the trouble General Lu!” Chen Yao was truly relieved because he did not need to eat this pig feed.

Nearby people also shouted the same words like Chen Yao, saying their stomach is not good and can only eat congee.

“Hahaha, good then, because Bu also likes to eat congee in the evening, therefore I had boiled a pot of congee for all of us. Because of Master Chen cannot eat solid food, therefore I offer Master Chen my congee! Servants, please serve the congee!”

What the hell is this congee? Chen Yao’s mouth twitched. Congee in his mind should be like La Ba congee, made up of many kinds of rice, beans, dried fruit, tofu, potato, meat and vegetables and even red beans, also sometimes added with ginseng and honey. That is congee in this time and age.

But this congee, it is just like that pig feed. Full of brown rice and little stones, not a single piece of rice can be seen. Furthermore, this congee also had grass and had insects moving inside.

“Come, come. Since all of your stomach is not good, we eat one bowl of congee! Careful eating it, so none of you are choked by it!”

The banquet continues until a messenger of Lu Bu’s army who quickly bend his knees toward Lu Bu, ready to announce his report in whisper, but Lu Bu stopped him.

“If you have any words, speak frankly. All of Lujiang noble families head are here now!”

“Reporting to Milord. New grain and provisions are already inside the storage. Due to grain storage being full, there are surplus 4000-shi. Mr. Chen Gong awaiting Milord’s order on how should handle this!”