Re:life with Karmic Gacha (Modern Family)

Chapter 171: Chapter 171: ?Bro.

A staff member ran to give him a towel, prompting him to say his thanks before walking toward where his manager was standing.

While wiping his face and wet hair, Edward asked, "How many more are on the schedule?"

"Only one left. And congrats Ed for finishing your tour." The awkward asian man smiled brightly as he wanted to give Edward a hug, but stopped halfway considering how sweaty the singer was, and settled for a handshake instead.

Edward laughed and said, "Jim-"

"Randall...Please stop calling me Jim Halpert. I don\'t even get that reference." Randall Park said exasperatedly, but with a smile on his face.

He still remembers when he went for the interview, Edward hired him instantly when he saw his face. He has been called many names such as \'Jimmy Woo, Jim Halpert\', and many more.

At first he thought that Edward was secretly racist, but then he figured out that he had been calling him some character\'s name from a show he had never watched.

"Oh, and the FBI is sending an agent today." Randall continued. Edward was confused, "For what? Why didn\'t they go to the company?"

"No, they said it was for your protection. I think they want to talk to you before your concert." Randall guessed.

"???" Edward was confused as he thought about it.

"Anyway...Let\'s go meet my super fans.. Shall we?"

"You mean, your richest fans? That you want to empty out their wallet today?" Randall joked with the truth.

Edward pouted, "It seems that you want to go to find me a nice shooting location in Antarctica."

His threat didn\'t work as Randall was excited instead, "And meet the penguins?!"

"..."

Edward didn\'t say anything and just left.

...

After finishing school, Alex, Finneas, Billy and Enid who were still in middle school went to visit the Palisades High School to support their friend.

"Hmmm....I don\'t think Ed can make it." Jacob said, filled with nervous energy as he was going to try out for the football team.

Elsa was a bit dissatisfied and irritated, "Didn\'t he promise you that he\'s going to try out with you? Did he forget? I\'ll call him-"

Before she could dial her phone, Jacob stopped her gently, "You can\'t really blame the guy. He\'s basically been working 20 hours a day non stop for almost the entire summer."

"But-"

"It\'s fine. I don\'t want him here. I\'d rather let him rest for a bit. Besides, this isn\'t the only try outs the team is going to hold. There\'s going to be another one in the next season." Jacob said, hiding his sadness, but it was obvious to see when people looked into his eyes.

"Ugh!" Elsa grunted in anger. Although she understood what Jacob said, she knew that her boyfriend was very much looking forward to joining the team with Edward.

"You know, if the teacher\'s a fan, Edward could just waltz in everytime you guys are training." Alex said comfortingly.

Elsa and Jacob both turned towards her with an excited look on their faces. Jacob, because he imagined it, and Elsa because she found out how to motivate his boyfriend.

And then, Elsa was hit with a sudden sense of worthlessness as she turned back to look at Jacob and saw his expectant look.

"Babe. Tell me. You love Edward more than you love your own girlfriend right?" Elsa said self-deprecatingly.

"NO JACOB DON\'T ANSWER IT\'S A TRAP!" Abraham shouted immediately as he saw the dangerous scene in front of him.

While Abraham was arguing with Elsa and everyone was paying attention to them, Enid nudged Alex\'s waist slightly with her elbow.

"Hey, Edward is coming, right?" Enid asked, whispering.

"I really have no idea-"

"Liar. You\'d been texting him the entire time." Enid exposed her.

"Well I don\'t want to break Jacob\'s heart before he auditions!" Alex replied defensively and pulled Enid to the back to have a private talk with her.

[Alex\'s commentary]

"A few days ago, my mom and my dad suddenly decided to compete to see who could run the fastest. It was the first day of school, so I didn\'t pay much attention to them, but then when I told Edward about it, he said, \'Let\'s make this interesting\'."

"I picked my mom as she was the most obvious choice. She ran every day. She even participated in a half-marathon last year. So yeah, I thought I could finally win and completely wipe out my bet debt to him. You know, the one where I need to lie for him 3 times. I did it twice, but he\'s been dragging out the last one. I live in anxiety every single day since he won that bet, and even have nightmares about it." Alex exaggerates.

"But, the result of the race disappoints me." Alex muttered in a sad tone before she got irritated, "He even guessed that Haley would run my dad over with a car. I mean, how is that even possible!?"

[Commentary ends]

Standing a few metres away at the audience seat was Haley, Tara, and Tara\'s new boyfriend who\'s a senior football team player.

"Hey Haley, who do you like watching more? Me or Tim?" A sleazy football player tried to flirt with Haley from the ground.

"She\'d rather stab her eyeball with a fork than watch either of you losers. AndFuck off Kim! Your name sounds like a girl\'s name." Tara chased the dumb jock away. They laughed while they walked towards their coach, and Tara said to Haley, "Are you sure you\'re going to wait here?"

"Yeah. Don\'t you have to wait here too?" Haley asked Tara in confusion. Tara looked at her boyfriend and waved him away as he went to huddle up before replying to Haley, "Nah. I\'m meeting with Dan at the mall."

"Wait. You\'re dating both boys at once?!"

"No. Dan and I aren\'t dating. We\'re just talking and making out a little." Tara replied casually with a sly grin. "What about you? Still waiting for the prince to look your way?"

"Shut up! I\'m not waiting for anything!"

"Really? Cause a lot of guys have been asking you out since school started, and you said no to all of them."

"Um... Cause they are all immature that\'s why!" Haley said angrily. Before Tara could walk away, she grabbed her arm and said, "You\'re waiting here with me?"

Tara was flabbergasted, "But...the movie?"

"NO!" Haley hugged Tara\'s arm tightly, locking her to the football field.

...

In Las Vegas. Edward was having his song rehearsal, but with the appearance of his super fans inside the recording studio.

There were quite a few of the \'Hollywood elite\' present in fact, or the future of it anyway since amongst the few lucky VVIPs were the youngest Kardashians (Kendall and Kylie) in front of him as well as the Hadid Sisters (Gigi and Bella). Kendall Jenner in particular kept staring at him as a lovesick puppy while batting her eyes at him.

"Hi everyone! Let\'s see...Now that I\'m done warming up, should we play a game? Just shout the songs you want me to sing." Edward said to the small crowd with a charming smile.

"What about you, the one in the red dress?" Edward pointed at the Russian girl with giant \'assets\' as everyone inside the hall had their hands up.

With a thick Russian accent, the girl asked hesitantly, "Do you...play the game?"

"The ones where I create a song on the spot? You can try, maybe if you\'re lucky..." Edward said mischievously, causing the Russian girl to blush. "How about the one next to you, yeah, the hot one...I think your last name is Volkov...Right?"

The classy girl next to the slutty one smiled and then stood up slowly to talk with Edward. While she was standing up, a woman in her 30s silently swiped Volkov\'s phone and put a bug inside it without anyone noticing. Then, she silently left the hall.

Edward played around with the crowd for a while. He talked with the Kardasian/Jenner sisters, played a game with Gigi Hadid, Kendall Jenner, and the two Russian girls, and even had brunch together with the group.

"So Edward. You\'re...single right now right? What do you think...about me?" Gigi Hadid asked with a blush on her face while posing in the best posture for Edward to see her beauty.

Edward rubbed his chin as he pretended to scrutinise the girl. The girl\'s heart beats quicker, and she finally feels relieved after Edward said, "You\'re very beautiful. Alas..."

"What? Why?" Gigi grabbed Edward\'s hand and whined.

"I don\'t date girls younger than 16."

"Huh? Seriously?" Gigi was a bit irritated.

"Yeah. But it wasn\'t because I didn\'t want to. I\'m just attracted to...you know, that age. So try again in a couple of years." Edward said jokingly.

Gigi was taken aback, and then she hugged Edward\'s arm as she caught the hint and smiled. "You\'re the best!"

"Edward, I...feed you?" Katrina, the slutty Russian girl pleaded. Edward nodded and opened his mouth, simply pleasing the girls there.

He didn\'t want to say no to them. After all, the pass they bought made him a HUGE profit plus the exorbitant price was enough to have Pepper pulling his hair out when he heard the idea thinking no one would be delusional enough to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars in order to just share a few days with a pop star, boy was he wrong though the places were filled up so fast it wasn\'t even funny.

Before his concert started, Edward was met with an offer. The Russian girls wanted to meet with him tonight after the concert.

Edward smiled as he waved goodbye to them, and then returned backstage after talking with the girls, where he met with agent Angela Page, FBI. (TBBT)

"So, you did it right?" Edward asked her.

"Yes. Thanks for your help."

"So, they want me to meet them later tonight...Should I?"

"It\'s better if you don\'t." The agent replied decisively.

Edward pouted and then muttered, "Alright then. Out. I have to prepare."

Before the agent left, Edward stopped her, "Oh wait. I forgot something."

"Hmm?"

"You...didn\'t expect me to do this for free...right?" Edward said with a sly grin on his face.

Agent Page gulped her saliva but kept a poker face, "What can I do for you Mr Newgate?"

"Just a couple of things. I\'ll send you a list. And Ohh, one of them, I\'m going to need it as soon as possible."

...

At a football field.

"66 go long!" The coach said before Jacob ran across the yard. Then, the quarterback threw the ball towards him. Jacob turned to look at the ball, and then he fumbled, the ball hit his face, and he fell down on the ground.

"Oh come on!" Elsa shouted. "BABE! FOCUS!" She shouted in a shrill manner. The coach blew the whistle and said, "NEXT!" Another kid went on to try for the team while Jacob embarrassingly walked to the side of the field.

Alex muttered in concern, "You didn\'t miss one catch during practice. But you can\'t catch a slow ball when you really need to?"

Abraham scoffed and said defending Jacob, "It\'s not that he can\'t. But his mind is filled with Edward\'s balls that– Wait, that was weird."

The group chuckled at Abraham\'s poor choice of words before Finneas said, "Jacob, you just have to imagine the ball is Edward\'s balls. Wait. Maybe you shouldn\'t. That way you won\'t want to catch it with your face."

Alex guffawed and hit Finneas\'s arm. Jacob\'s mood was lifted and he said, "Alright. Stop talking about Edward\'s balls."

"JACOB GREEN! Defense line!" The coach called again.

"Alright. My last chance- Wait, what\'s that!" Jacob screamed as he pointed in the sky. The field started getting windy as a helicopter flew close to the ground. Edward held a megaphone and screamed, "Coach! Sorry I\'m late!"

"EDWARDDD!!!" His group of friends shouted in excitement as a rope ladder was thrown to the ground. Edward slowly climbed down on the ladder as the helicopter steadied itself.

"Why...(Spits) is...(Spits)..The leaves...(Spits)...Is only entering my mouth(Spits)" Abraham shouted in agony as he could barely open his eyes from the wind pressure.

Jenna\'s hair fluttered in the wind, and she watched Edward\'s descend with a lot of worry, "Please don\'t fall, please don\'t fall. God, please don\'t let Edward fall." She prayed for Edward\'s safety non-stop.

Enid ran to where Edward was descending while holding her phone and recording the whole thing.

"Oh my god. This is the legendary school entrance...EVER!!!"

Not only them, but a lot of people who were still at school started to gather around the football stadium to check out the noise. The crowd clapped as Edward safely landed on the ground and ran lightly to go to where the coach was standing.

Haley slapped Tara\'s arm repeatedly, causing her friend to squirm in pain. "Stop that!"

"He\'s here! He\'s finally here!"

"Yeah, but he don\'t know you\'re here-"

"HALEY!" Edward shouted from afar as he waved at Haley. The latter giggled and said to her friend, "You were saying?"

"Ugh." Tara groaned in disgust. "Now can I leave?"

"What? Oh, yeah yeah sure. You can leave." Haley said casually while blushing as she gazed in Edward\'s direction.

Jacob walked towards Edward and said, "I didn\'t believe you would come."

"That\'s what she said." Abraham interrupted.

Edward chuckled and gave him a thumbs up before saying, "Well, I promised didn\'t I?"

"Umm..." Alex looked at the duo with an excited look as her imagination ran wild. Enid was already breathing heavily beside her, and pinching her nose to make sure that she wouldn\'t get a nosebleed.

"I need to talk to the coach." Edward said before he turned around, but surprisingly, the fat coach with a white mustache had already walked towards him.

"Edward, right? The principal told me you\'d be coming here. If you did this last year, maybe I\'ll send you to the principal\'s office, but I want to retire peacefully this year, so I\'m just going to let you off with a warning. Are you here to audition for the Dolphins?"

Edward scowled in disgust, "Ugh. Dolphins. Who in their right mind would name the school team after the ocean\'s most prominent rapist– Yeah, I\'m trying out for the team."

"Really? Are you sure? Signing up for the team will make you open to getting injured. And I figured it would be a pretty big risk for you to take considering you need all of your fingers to play your instruments."

Jacob turned pale as he realized the truth behind the coach\'s words. He interrupted quickly, "No coach. He\'s just here to root for me. He\'s not joining the team."

Edward scoffed and slapped the back of Jacob\'s helmeted head. "Calm down will ya. I already said I\'m going to try to enter the team, and I\'m not going back on my words. Also, I need to have a long talk with Principal Brown about changing the school\'s team mascot."

"But Ed-" Alex chimed in.

"Bup Bup Bup Bup Bup. I\'m not doing it for Jacob. My hands have been itching to play football for a while now. So you guys don\'t have to convince me otherwise. Also, I\'m aiming to be the team\'s backup. You guys know how my schedule is right?"

Edward\'s group of friends nodded knowingly. Finneas muttered, "The back breaking schedule."

"The GOD is dead schedule." Jenna added.

"The \'I\'m a money making monster\' schedule." Alex chimed in.

"Shut up all of you." Edward scolded them.

The coach smiled and before Edward could show his skills, he said, "Alright. You\'re on the team."

"That\'s easy??" Jacob muttered in confusion.

"You made the team too Green." The coach turned to Jacob and said.

"Wait what?" Elsa contorted her face in confusion.

The coach then said, "Well we lost most of the team players after the seniors all graduated. So, we need everyone that we can get. The training starts next week. See you then."

Edward grabbed the coach\'s shoulder before he could walk away, "That\'s it???"

The coach nodded casually, "Yeah. And also, between you and me, a celebrity joining our team is really good for when I want to apply for funding. So I\'m not going to even try to see if you\'re good or not."

The coach walked away happily, leaving behind a stunned group of students.

"So I guess...I\'m on the team?" Edward said in disbelief and puzzlement. Jacob was confused too, but then Elsa shouted, "YOU GUYS ARE ON THE TEAM!!"

Enid joined in, "CONGRATULATIONS YOU GUYS!!!"

"WAY TO GO!" Jenna shouted.

Alex was laughing till her stomach hurts from the incident that she missed out on the group hug later on.

...

[Edward POV]

"Haley!" I called from afar. Haley turned quickly and before she could react, I had already ran towards her and hugged her while spinning her around. She exclaimed excitedly as she hugged me back, "You\'re back!"

"For now-" I put Haley down, but before I could talk to her, he saw Alex and the rest of his friends looking at him in dissatisfaction.

"What?" I asked in confusion.

"Why does SHE have the special greeting? I want that too!" Abraham said.

I furrowed my brows in disgust, "I\'m not hugging you."

"Sexist!" Abraham jeered.

"Don\'t discriminate against men!" Finneas added.

"Yeah! Or we\'ll talk shit about you on twitter!" Jacob joined in.

"Fuck off!" I raised my middle finger to them.

"Edward! You\'re back! Now, spin me too!" Enid said mockingly as she pretended Jenna was Edward. Jenna laughed and ran towards Enid before hugging her and spinning her around. She then ran her finger on Enid\'s side of the face before grabbing her chin, "I\'m back my love."

Haley blushed and I could feel the blood rushing towards my head. I laughed with a red face and said, "Alright. Hang out at my place? Who\'s in?"