BXBX NOVEL Chapter 62 - Feeling Guilty
They reached Vivian\'s home late in the afternoon.
Vivian went to her room to freshen up before dinner. Aiden and Sarah went to the guest room.
"Go and shower first. I still have work to do.", Aiden told Sarah while pulling out his laptop and powering it on.
Sarah observed that he started working again and could not help but feel guilty. \'He spent so much time with me instead of working. I need to give him space.\' She went to take a shower without a word.
When she came back, he didn\'t acknowledge her presence. His gaze was focused on the screen and the only thing moving were his fingers which danced over the keyboard.
Sarah didn\'t want to disturb him. She took her phone and went out. She ended up in the family room, which was empty, and decided to call JoAnna.
It was ringing for some time, Sarah thought it will go to the voicemail, when she heard JoAnna\'s voice: "Hey, how are you doing?"
"I\'m fine. How are things on your side?"
"It\'s still fresh." JoAnna is not the person who will beat around the bush.
"Not good, a?" Sarah understood what her sister wanted to say.
"That is a simple way to put it. Three of us tried talking with dad on few different occasions, but he does not want to listen. Dad even got angry and started yelling at us. He is very stubborn."
Sarah sighed. She was prepared that it will take some time, but it still hurt hearing about it.
JoAnna knows that her sister is hurt. Besides moral support there is one more thing she can do. "I will send you money next week."
Sarah rejected her offer. "No need. But I really appreciate the thought."
"Are you sure? With dad being like this, how will you cover your expenses?"
"Don\'t worry. I got it covered. Tell Sophia for me that I\'m not short of money."
JoAnna was silent for few seconds before giving in. "OK. But if your bank account starts running low, think of me first, promise?"
"Yes, I promise." Sarah could not help but smile. It made her feel warm and fuzzy thinking how much her sister cares about her. She thought of telling JoAnna that she accepted a job, but she decided not to. The idea of her working at White corp. with Aiden still didn\'t sink in, so until she settles in her new role, she will keep it a secret from her family, if possible.
JoAnna remembered that Sarah went to visit Gabriel. "Did you visit your friend in the hospital?"
"Yes, we did."
"And?"
"He is better. His family is there, so after visit we came back. I\'m at Vivian\'s place now." Sarah kept it short. JoAnna does not need to know the details of Vivian\'s love disappointment anyway.
"I see... What will you do for the New Year\'s?"
"I will stay in Fairfield. In next few days I plan to go and check out the apartment. If I like it, I will move in… If I don\'t, I can always stay in dorms." Sarah is happy that while she is a student at Tesla University, she does not need to worry for a place to stay.
"I talked with Sophia about this. We can come and give you company for New Year\'s."
Sarah was touched. "No need. Just stay home or do whatever your plans were before all these crazy happenings. If you come here, dad will get even more mad."
"Will Aiden be with you?"
"I don\'t know what his plans are.", Sarah admitted.
"Just don\'t be alone. OK? It\'s sad to be by yourself on New Year\'s Eve. Make sure you have some company, or I will come."
"Thank you." Sarah felt lucky to have such loving sisters. \'They would even cancel their plans and come to give me company.\' She could not help but smile.
When Sarah returned to the room, Aiden was not there. She could hear the shower running. Sarah plopped on the bed and stared at the ceiling for some time before drifting off to sleep.
…
It was dinner time. Aiden sat on the bed next to Sarah and ran his fingers through her hair before kissing her cheeks gently. Sarah woke up after few kisses, but she didn\'t want to open her eyes. Aiden noticed that she is awake and stopped kissing her.
"Mmm, I\'m still sleeping. Keep going!" Sarah protested without opening her eyes.
Aiden laughed and pinched her nose. "It\'s dinner time."
She opened her eyes and looked at him. He is super-attractive with his hair damp and slightly messy after shower.
\'I can\'t believe my luck, to have such a man next to me!\' Sarah admired him while thinking: \'He is perfect, and his loving gaze is directed at me…\'
Sarah remembered that he was working last time she saw him. "Did you make progress with your work?"
Small frown appeared on his face. "I made some progress. But there is still a lot to do."
She likes that he told her the truth and didn\'t try to make it sound like everything is fine. Again, she felt guilty for taking up his time. \'He has so much work, and he spent the day driving back and forth to the hospital without a word of complaint. I don\'t know how I can make it up to him.\'
...
After dinner, Vivian and Sarah decided to binge on ice cream.
Aiden said he will pass on the ice cream. Instead, he will go back to his work.
Sarah was grateful that he is letting them have some girl time.
As he was about to leave, Sarah held his hand and leaned closer toward him. "Don\'t sleep off."
"Mhm, I will wait for you", he smiled and inched closer to her.
"I\'m counting on it…" Sarah planted a light kiss on his lips.
Vivian cleared her throat. "You two... can you tone it down a bit? My heart can\'t take it."
Sarah and Aiden laughed, and he wished Vivian good night before leaving.
Sarah and Vivian went to the kitchen and took a pail of ice cream each. They sat on the bar stools at the kitchen island and started working on their ice cream.
"How are you holding on?" Sarah observed Vivian.
"It\'s not bad now. But it will be when I\'m alone." Vivian admitted and sighed.
"I can give you company as long as you want." Sarah was honest.
"I really appreciate it, but this is something I need to plow through. It\'s not my first heartbreak. Sooner or later I will be all alone, and the emotions will come out." Vivian took a spoonful of ice cream and observed it. "Maybe it\'s better to happen sooner. I will feel miserable and cry my eyes out. After a day, or a week, or a month I will run out of tears. Eventually, I will get over him and keep going on with my life." Vivian put the spoon with ice cream in her mouth, with her eyes staring into space, unfocused.
Two friends sat in the kitchen, in silence, eating ice cream for a long time.
"What are your plans for the rest of the holidays?" Vivian asked Sarah.
"I can\'t go home. I have an apartment in Fairfield. I will go and check it out. If I like it, I will stay there until I figure out what to do." Sarah explained.
"When did you get an apartment there?" Vivian could not hide her surprise. Sarah thought that she even saw a trace of jealousy, but only for a moment.
Sarah shook her head and smiled while dispersing thoughts that Vivian is jealous of her. Sarah reasoned that anyone can feel envy, even toward its closest ones. She explained: "My parents got it for me earlier. And gave me the keys yesterday."
"That is convenient for you and Aiden." Vivian said suggestively.
"He has his own place. My apartment is not adding much of a convenience." Sarah smiled. "Besides, I don\'t know how it looks like. I need to see it first. Who knows, maybe it\'s hideous. Or maybe it\'s a fancy penthouse with gorgeous views." Sarah could not hide her enthusiasm.
"I see you are excited about it." Vivian observed and faintly smiled. "Don\'t worry about me. I\'m fine if you leave tomorrow."
Vivian suddenly looked panicked, realizing what she said. "Don\'t get me wrong, I\'m not kicking you out. I\'m just telling you that you can leave anytime without feeling any pressure from my side."
Sarah laughed. "Thank you. I will talk with Aiden. We might head out tomorrow then. I am curious to see the apartment."
...
When Sarah returned to the room, it was almost midnight. Aiden was still busy at his laptop.
Sarah felt her heart ache when she saw him working so much. She thought how much time he spent with her in last few days instead of working.
Sarah got ready for sleep, put her pajamas on and sat on the bed with her laptop next to her.
She started doing research on the importance of nicknames for lovers. \'Hmm... it seems that it does add intimacy, having meaningful sweet nicknames for each other...\' She found a blog that provided an example: \'In case of a nickname "Chocolate Bear" it will be meaningful if your man is big and strong and likes chocolate.\' Sarah nodded while reading, \'I see now. But what would be a good nickname for Aiden? I need to find suggestions, I will search for list of popular nicknames, I might get some ideas that work...\'
No matter how much she read or what examples she found, nothing seemed appropriate for her Greek God. He was perfect and there was only word that matched his appearance and personality: Aiden.
At this time, Aiden closed his laptop and joined Sarah in the bed. She quickly closed her laptop and looked at him. "How about we head out of here tomorrow? I would like to check out my new place. What do you say?"
"Whatever you want." He said dotingly.
Sarah observed that he is not wearing his pajamas. "You should get ready for sleep."
Aiden obediently went to freshen up and put his pajamas on.
While he was in the bathroom, Sarah was back to thinking about nicknames. It was a topic that will keep her busy for a while.
When he came back to the room, Sarah remembered her talk with JoAnna about New Year\'s. "Hmm... do you have plans for New Year\'s?"
He responded right away: "Yes."
In an instant, Sarah\'s mood dropped.