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Perfection is exhausting, perfectionists are exhausting... and when you have an entire cast and crew hellbent on achieving such unreachable notions, you got yourself a right recipe for the slog of a lifetime.

I mean, I get it, passion projects, every single person here was a diehard fan pouring their blood, sweat and tears in every frame of the scene, and they got my commendation.... but seriously, is it worth cutting a golden take, just cause a mug isn’t tilted the right angle?

Granted, it was my mug... and granted, perhaps it was blocking the shot, but still... couldn’t have just edited it out in post?

Thankfully, after one exhausting morning later, the shoot was finally over.

While the cleaners entered the scene, with their brooms and mops, and, and the camera folks began dismantling equipment, I was navigating through a fine mess of broken props and spilled drinks, in hopes of finding a clean, empty spot to collapse myself onto.

There I was, sinking down in a corner somewhere, costume utterly soaked to the bone in sweat, beer, and passion, watching as both cast and crew cheered and hollered, patting each other on the back on a job well done.

.....

I’d join, but... corner gets lonely pretty easily, haven’t the heart to leave it. I’m just nice like that.

So, after like three hours’ worth of takes, I’m now officially recruited into the hems of Leonardo’s ever-expanding fold... supposedly in awe of his strength and skill, with bruised eyes twinkling and seeing chances for further exploitations, I reintroduced myself, made amends, and offered up my skills and expertise towards his plight.

The first order of business was to find someone who knew more than me about rumors of a long-abandoned portal... that is if me and my character don’t eventually end up on the cutting room floor.

Still fumbling every other take, still mumbling over my lines... even I can tell that I wasn’t exactly giving the performance of a lifetime.

But in spite of it, to my genuine surprise, Mr. director himself walked up to my corner, muttered a thanks for my good work, before putting on some shades and disappearing out the door with his crew without another word.

Didn’t mention a word about my involvement in the next shooting... but guess, we’ll see.

As things began to wind down, even some of the actors went out of their way to talk to me personally.

Big fans, they say – turns out most of the cast were there in the stands when I went and did the big show back at the convention. Which was... pretty cool actually. I was genuinely flattered.

“You did pretty well today,” Leon said with a cordial pat on the shoulder. “First-timer, right? Not bad improvising, pretty believable reactions too. You might actually have a talent for this.”

“That, or a mother seriously in love with movies,” I muttered. “I’m just pretty much monkey see, monkey do-ing this whole shtick.”

But he didn’t let that taint his judgment, nodding his head, still very much impressed, “Smart monkey, then.”

“I guess.”

“Think there’s anymore where that came from?” He asked, batting keen unsuspecting eyes motive-less eyes. “We’re still pretty short when it comes to actors to fill in the other characters... were only shooting scenes based on who we got, you see.”

“I see.”

“Like, we still haven’t gotten our Terestra yet. Director’s pretty strict on that front – turning down everyone trying to audition. Just can’t seem to find the perfect one.”

“I see.”

“Also an Elf part – we’re missing an actor for an Elf...” He blinked rapidly. “Do you think maybe Ash could – ?”

“She’s sick.”

“I see.”

And that was that.

We shook hands farewell, and there he went out the tavern door rushing to lend a hand to his dear ol’ Dad’s little Christmas event thing.

“Oh, by the way,” He called out, turning back briefly. “Director told me to mention – congrats, you’re officially a character in the story... with written lines and everything.”

“Oh,” I said, nearly forgetting to smile. “Joy...”

“Yep, knew you’d be ecstatic,” He beamed, before waving goodbye again. “Anyway, looking forward to the next shoot! See you there!”

“Yep,” I said, my lips forever frozen upwards. “See ya...”

When it was finally safe to walk the timbered grounds again, I found a seat and a table, and ordered myself some lunch – figured I’m already in a tavern, so why not?

Apparently, everyone else had the same idea, and from actors on a set, we’ve turned into actual paying customers too... owner certainly wasn’t complaining, dashing in and out the counter, beset by a constant influx of orders, and taking it to all gladly.

Then, from out of the blue, I got jumped – like literally jumped on.

Some cheeky gal purposefully mistaking my lap as a springy mattress, and plopping herself down, body and all, with complete utter disregard for my personal space, absolutely no remorse... just cause she’s kinda cute or something.

And shit, I guess she is pretty cute...

Hazel eyes batting sweetly, she wrapped her arms around my neck, and asked with a smile, “Mind if I sit?”

Ignoring the throbbing in my thighs beneath her weight, I said, “A little late to be asking me that now, don’t you think?”

“Ah, well...” She shifted about, leaving falling as she adjusted herself to a more comfortable, closer position, resting her head contently against my shoulder. “Better late than never, they say.”

Then, she started to purr right after, just like a cat. A very big, very leafy cat.

“Amanda or Tressa?” I asked, plucking a stray leaf clinging to the tip of her nose. “Who exactly do I owe the pleasure of playing body pillow to?”

“Mmm,” She purred again. “Got my apology gift ready yet?”

Amanda it is.

“Well,” I began. “I figured nothing I may suggest might satisfy so I decided to leave my heart-wrenching to your dastardly whims instead... whatever the hell they may be.”

She lifted her head, her gaze narrowing to a calculated squint, “I knew you’d say that.”

“And I knew you knew I’d say that,” I responded, squinting right back. “So, you can drop any schemes you have ready – just say away, tell me how I can mend your clearly broken heart.”

“Hmm,” Amanda smirked, rocking herself back and forth in a deep moment of contemplation. “What to ask, what to ask... anything I want, anything I desire... my darling boyfriend so eager to please ~ ”

She better make a decision quick, her hips keep grinding on me the way they were right then, skin-tight, supple... well, a man can only contain himself for so long.

Something tells me she’s all too aware of every motion of her body... call it a gut feeling.

Suddenly, Amanda stopped swaying... sadly, looking directly back at me again, eyes twinkling afresh with bright ideas.

“I have a thing to do, you see...”

“A thing,” I parroted.

“Many things, actually,” She rectified, her sweet smile feeling so ominous. “But no fear – it’s just scouting for locations for potential scenes, nothing much.”

“Scouting? Since when do the actors do the scouting themselves?”

“I volunteered myself,” Amanda replied, then poke a playful finger into my ribs. “And now, so will you!”

“Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously! Or what – will you really leave me all on my own? Forced out in this blistering cold? A whole day in isolation, of nothing but hard work and – ”

“Wait, but you volunteered – ”

“Alone!” She wailed again, crocodile tears soaking my coat. “Unloved, unwanted, undesired by – ”

“Hold on, I didn’t say I wouldn’t. I’m just – surprised.”

“Surprised?” Amanda cocked her head. “About?”

“Well, y’know, I was expecting the usual Amanda-ish stuff...”

“Like?”

“I don’t know, sword fights, car chases, some explosions... usually you got me doing the most bizarre things. Like this, a movie, seriously?”

She smiled at that. “Love you.”

“I got yelled at, y’know?”

“For me,” She spoke so tenderly, wiping away invisible tears from her lashes. “Yelled at for me. For my sake. I mean, what girl could ask for more?”

“You apparently,” I rolled my eyes, “Anway, scouting locations,” I went on. “Well, it’s pretty tame when you compare it to your usual standard affair. It’s weird.”

“Weird?” She snorted.

“It’s suspicious.”

“Suspicious?”

“I’m just saying... I arrived expecting a full day’s worth of scouting. Who’s to say you don’t got something extra planned for me too?”

“Oh please, now that’s just plain paranoia talking, don’t you think?”

I gave her a dubious stare. “You really think so?”

“Mmm-hmm!” She said, doubling down with a wide reassuring smile. “I mean, in this cold, in this season, days before the second most romantic holiday of the year, you really think I have something special planned, something sinister I got hidden up my sleeves?”

Mmm, suddenly that smile doesn’t look as such assuring anymore.

“Well, well,” She muttered, a low chuckle leaving her sweet smile. “Maybe you might be on to something, after all...”

.....